Today, as good as yesterday was for our business with the meetings I set up with clients whom I’d never met in person, was the best day as far as epiphanies and life-changing information and personal development I’ve ever had.
It was one great speaker after another, but two very much made me think about who I am, what I do, and why I think about why I am feeling the way I do. You know me by now: you’re going to get the real deal here, so I hope this has as much meaning to you as it does me.
Find a happy place
The first speaker, Cathy Brooks, had us first close our laptops, close our eyes, breathe (deeply – hah!), and take ourselves to the place where we are most happy (preferably not in front of your computer).
I was lost. I was floating around from memory to memory, place to place trying to find where I am most happy. The beach in the shade in our lawn chairs? Our vacation in Tennessee? The floor watching TV with Beautiful? Our patio when we’re sitting in the sun reading and talking about stuff?
I was crushed! Am I happy? If I’m not, what is the cause? It was the next speaker who may have uncovered why I was questioning my happiness.
Today We Are Rich
That is the title of the latest book by Tim Sanders (@SandersSays). I put it on my nightstand in the hotel to read tonight to see how far I get before I sleep. I want to be quite clear about this next statement, as it holds no exaggeration. Apart from a speaker at church camp in Jr. High who cut me to the core with a talk and changed my life for an eternity, this was the single best talk I’ve ever heard in all of my years of sermons, going to motivational business meetings, watching videos, and fantastic conferences of the past. I’m even going to investigate a psychological diagnosis that makes sense for how I feel.
At times it was as if he was speaking directly to me and other times it was as if he was channeling my thoughts and values exactly. My stomach was doing very strange things, similar to what it does when I watch “The Secret Millionaire.”
I’m dubbing it “the stirring.” Today was a full dose of 5 minutes of “the stirring.” Why? Here are his most poignant quotes that hit me.
“You own technology, technology doesn’t own you. Declare offline zones.”
I check my e-mail too often. In fact, in agreement with the first speaker’s admonishment, I get up, walk to the bathroom, and check my e-mail, Facebook, and Twitter before coming down and starting my day. My online communication just dictated the rest of my day to me. Check e-mail every 2-3 hours instead of every 2 minutes. People will just think you’re slow with e-mail and grow to expect it. Many of my clients are present (at least the most consistent ones), so I’m going to ask if that’s true and if it won’t mar my reputation for the level of service I provide. I would love to relax from tech, but I’m afraid I’ll miss the opportunity that sets me for life. I need to let go of that fear.
“If you can worry, you can dream.”
How is that for speaking to the issue of anxiety? This is one of his points where I felt like he was channeling my thoughts. It’s exactly what I’ve been saying here for months, and I felt somehow vindicated over the naysayers who don’t subscribe to that school of thought.
“Turn your “have-to’s” into “get-to’s.”
How many of us are (arguably rightfully so) ticked at having to do our treatments for so many hours every day just to have a “normal” decreased life from our peers? /raises hand
See those as opportunities. When his grandmother came down with cancer, she said:
“‘I am going to be the most positive cancer patient they have ever had at the center in Dallas’ and she got up every day saying, ‘I get to get up every day and minister to these beautiful, wonderful nurses. I get to go today and fight for my life and I’m not going to cry like Job.’ I’ll never forget her sitting on her bed clapping her hands … saying ‘This is my challenge. I’m not going to cry like Job. I get to. I get to.'”
What are you going to do to change your “have-to’s” into “get-to’s?”
“People aren’t successful; they are products of their success stories.”
Playing off what I said last night, I want to be like those in the conference whom I see as “successful,” but I’m not envious. Envy is when you want something someone else has, but you don’t think you can ever get it, so you don’t want them to have it, either. That’s why it’s considered one of the “7 deadly sins” because it will eat you up on the inside – it’s poison. I’d have considered myself an “aspiring admirer” before this morning.
Given this view of success, it is clear that we label people as “successful” based on their success stories. I have plenty of success stories under my belt, both personally and professionally. It then occurred to me: I am successful. I am a success. I’m not the same success as so-and-so across the room about to speak with authority on the next topic or next week to a group of people paying them tens of thousands of dollars, but in what I do, I am successful, therefore I am a success. Epiphany, anyone?
If any of you are interested in a young Fatboy’s writing, nearly 5 years ago I wrote this as a guest post for a popular site – the founder of the conference I’m attending now, actually. It got 63 comments and most of those people are dear friends now, most of whom I’ve now met in person. I think it is eerie that I have similar feelings today as I did back then. I feel like I should be ashamed of myself for not realizing it, but I’ll see what I can do to set that right.
“Go create a ripple in the world.” and “If not you, then who?”
Enough said.
