American Idol: Top 24 Predictions

Last night was the second show of the main competition with the Top 24 (plus wildcard guy) done and votes cast. I’ve been watching American Idol since Week 2 of the Chris Daughtry season (Season 5) that Taylor Hicks won. Admittedly, I was so ticked to see Daughtry go that I skipped the next show and just tuned in to the finale. The next year was the first year I watched auditions and Hollywood week. I was hooked. I’ve also been blogging my predictions for several years on another site, but I decided to move that feature over here because this is where all of my friends are now. Without further ado, I bring you my Top 24 predictions for tonight’s results show.

Guys

Wow, what a disappointment. I really thought this was going to be a strong year for the guys this year, but more than half of the guys forgot how to sing, half of them sang female songs, and Deandre… where do I start with you, girl?

Reed Grimm – I really liked Reed in the auditions, but I hoped he’s get some ADHD meds after his Hollywood night when he changed his song with 30 minutes left, had to stop rehearsing to call his mommy and cry, and then looked like Animal from the Muppets behind the drum set. It was clear he didn’t get those meds in time Monday as he moved like he had to pee and played the drums with a face of a man who had just been shot in the kneecap. I could see you go – wildcard 1.

Adam Brock – If I hear the phrase “white chocolate” on the show again, I’m going to have an aneurism. No, you’re not a large black woman trapped in a metro white man’s body. You’re a nice guy, but the crying has got to end, as well as trying to sing the great Aretha Franklin. Good grief! What was he thinking? Good voice, no idea how to sing something people would buy. Dude, you have to go home to your new baby so we can stop seeing you walking around with your iPhone photos and crying into your dad’s hankie – eliminate 1.

DeAndre Brackensick – Okay, this is the last time I’m going to tell you (this week): you need to grow a pair and stop singing girlie falsetto. I have no idea what is possessing the judges to say you were the best of the guys, but I’ve had enough of your singing. Who buys that stuff? I can’t think of a single male artist who sings above high C as “their thing.” It’s sure not going to start with you. Sing like a man. I so want you eliminated, but when the judges give a review like that, they are – SAFE BUT GO HOME.

Colton Dixon – Second time is a charm, eh? I really like him, but Tuesday night was not good. Stay behind the piano. It’s not good when you dance your way up onto a grand piano in skinny jeans and skinnier legs and then sing the lyrics, “how did I get here?” man – eliminate 2.

Girls

Most of the girls did a stand-up job, though it was easy to pick out the good from the bad and just have a couple that are on the bubble. Of course, it’s not all about talent on Idol, is it? Some of the faltering ones will still get votes from those who like them as a person.

Chelsea Sorrell – I’ll give you this much: you didn’t suck. It just wasn’t good enough. The song was a bad choice, you weren’t singing to the camera, and it was just a lacking what it needed to be in the top half in order to continue – eliminate 1.

Erika Van Pelt – It was a rockin’ song, but it didn’t show off your voice much. I think you were calm enough to continue, though probably as a – wildcard 1.

Jen Hirsh – A good last note with that much so-so isn’t that good. However, you sang to your strengths and did a good job staying in some sort of Adele character (can we stop evoking the name of Adele 20 times per show, please?). You deserve to go on, but I think that performance makes you a – wildcard 2.

Brielle Von Hugel – I don’t like you or your mom. Some words that come to mind are: annoying, conceited, and entitled. Don’t play to the camera so much that it looks like you’re two seconds away from performing some mic-swallowing circus trick. Go home and annoy only those you are close to – eliminate 2.

Hallie Day – Just a pretty face, though I’m pretty sure she had a nose job – it’s reminiscent of Michael Jackson. The song just wasn’t in it for her. The music is better than the vocals, so it fell flat – eliminate 3.

Baylie Brown – Oh. My. Gosh. Can you find a way to sing an entire song flat on national TV? I started my howling at the moon mid-way to drown her out. Nice dress, though – eliminate 4.

Haley Johnsen – I’m “sorry,” but Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) is not a good song when it’s sung like that. Love the song, but that was not good enough. Good-bye – eliminate 4.

Shannon Magrane -“Hot, humid, and happening, just like your daughter” will be replayed for seasons to come. She’s my all-season favorite this year because she’s from TAMPA, yeah!!!!! The only thing that worries me about her performance was choosing “Go Light Your World.” I loved it, but will America? – wildcard 3.