Changing the standard of thinking.

Adjusting to Life As an “Old CFer”

Senior couple smiling portrait outdoorsNearly three years ago, I turned 30 and was rewarded with an awesome stainless steel grill to mark the milestone. Thanks, Beautiful! Since then, my appetite has decreased, my weight has (finally) increased, and I’ve been met with some really bad days recovering from things that used to pose no problem. Since returning from our second cross-country trip to and from Ohio in 8 weeks, I thought it’d be good to discuss how our bodies change as we get older.

I used to run all day and all night, only getting a couple of hours of sleep. When dating, I’d get up at 4am, be at work by 5am, get off work at 3:30, drive across town, and wait for Beautiful to get out of class and stay out with her until midnight… or later. Rinse and repeat. On days she worked, I’d go to Barnes & Noble and catch some winks in the comfy chairs until her shift was over. We did this for days at a time.

Stupid.

I used to have a very physical job in construction material testing. I moved several hundred pounds of 40-pound concrete cylinders by 7am and then moved, packed, and tested a solid ton of dirt throughout the day. Other days, I lugged around a 60-lb radioactive density tester around development sites that I stuck into the ground by driving an 18″ stake into the packed foundations of roads waiting to be paved.

The reality of aging with CF

What I’ve learned (but very slowly taken action as a result of knowing) is that I need far longer to recover from activity than I used to AND from doing things that I do with others. If we spend all day out and about on vacation, it’s pretty much a given that I need to rest the next day. Even things as simple as being outside my comfort zone and being social for a weekend takes its toll on me. Some things that have made me sick in the last 3 years or that I’ve learned the need to recover from:

  • travel by air or car
  • weekend conferences (even a 1-day conference) [Read more…]

For my 300th Post: a Celebration

Grandpa sharpening 2011We’ve got one more full day left here with Grandpa and Grandma before we head back home. It’s been a pretty emotional trip again. Last time I was so much a caregiver, I was “a bit off” in shock of that. This time I’ve been able to be more the grandson, but I still can’t get used to seeing Grandpa like this, but that’s how life goes – I’m just not used to dealing with it. Hospice came when we were in Niagara Falls and got him oxygen to help him breathe better. That’s hitting pretty close to home for me. It was almost too much.

We went to my uncle’s for an early Thanksgiving dinner last night and that was almost too much for him. Today’s been a day of relaxing and napping to recover. I’m not used to not being the sickest person in the house – I guess that’s a lot of what I’m dealing with. People accept things that happen over time better than quickly – this all seems to be moving too quickly for me. This isn’t how I want to remember Grandpa, so this post is a tribute to the man I’ve known my whole life. A rock. A pillow. A scrubbing pad face in the evening. 😉

The business owner

Grandpa, better known as Ivan Sipes to the rest of the world, was born in 1930 across the field and country road from where I sit now. They bought this farm in the 1950s and raised 4 kids. He bought and owned Bolinger Implement Company with his best friend LeRoy Miller, Jr. and successfully sold John Deere machinery and supplies for many a year from 1957-1975. He was such a successful businessman, when we go to the county fair with them, the sons and grandsons of his customers know him by face and name and stop to chat. I used to be annoyed by that as a kid, but as a business owner myself, I can only hope I care enough about my clients that their descendants have such fond memories of how I take care of my customers.

The employee

He was still a ways away from retirement when they sold the store, so he went to work for a local feed mill, Liberty Mill. I remember going there many times, also. Folks would stop in just to talk to Grandpa; talk about the weather, the crops, and their families… “oh, and I’ll take 40lbs of this seed while I’m here.” I’m sure that many local farmers drove further than they had to just to be served by him.

The father and husband

I’ve heard him say he wishes he was around more when the kids were growing up, but it’s not like he traveled and left everyone to fend for themselves. I’m sure it’s not any different than how I feel I’m at the computer too much and too busy working to take a half-day with a good friend who needs to talk. That’s going to change. He did fine by my book, too. Each is responsible for their kids and regards him as highly as I’ve ever seen in a family. He and Grandma celebrated 60 years of marriage last summer and we ALL came to pay respect for such an achievement. Quite a clan and quite a gathering of the community that came from far and wide to the open house at church. So much to learn about marriage from them – just by observing – you don’t even need to ask questions.

The grandpa

I don’t know why, but I started to be an adult and respect Grandpa’s wisdom a few years before my parents’ wisdom. After graduation, I flew up at least every year for a holiday and loved coming for 4th of July, the county fair at Labor Day, Thanksgiving, and Easter. They’ve always been more than generous and overlooking my faults when I showed my immaturity. In 32 years, I’ve never heard him say anything bad about anyone past letting me know he doesn’t much care for someone’s actions or demeanor. How many people can you say that about?

Here are some other photos I love.

Anniversary 2011 Trip Photos

We’re most of the way through our two-week vacation in Ohio/Niagara Falls now and have had a great time relaxing, visiting, and celebrating our anniversary. We’ve also been going crazy with our new camera. I’ve had my ups and downs of stamina walking about and seeing the sights around the hilly falls and have finally recovered from all of that exertion.

Not letting the cold or hills is how I outran CF last weekend. Sometimes it’s the small things that mean the most. Here are some photo highlights of our trip thus far. Hope you enjoy seeing them as much as I’ve enjoyed taking and editing them (especially liked editing the ones of Beautiful).

We walked down the falls on Saturday morning, heading out at 6am to get these shots and spent a good 90 minutes there.

American Falls Pre-Dawn

Canadian Falls Pre-Dawn

Beautiful and I took some photos of each other on the farm Sunday. What a hottie!

I’ve gone out to take some photos for fun, too. I think we’ll need a bigger hard drive before too long if we keep up this pace.

I’ve been good about doing my treatments morning and night, even though I’m sequestered to the living room but I am making good progress on my Netflix shows on my iPhone!

Tonight we are heading over to my uncle’s house for an early Thanksgiving dinner while 2 of the 3 “kids” are here. I’m sure my aunt will come for the real dinner next month, so I guess most everyone gets 3 huge holiday dinners this year. I don’t mind THAT a bit!

Stay strong, breathe easy people.

Fatboy and Beautiful – Five Wonderful Years

Maid of the MistFive years ago today, I asked Beautiful if she would love, honor, and cherish me  for better or worse, in sickness and health – she said “I do,” and so did I when she asked me. We kissed and ran down the isle to begin our new lives together. I remember it like yesterday. I also remember it like it was a lifetime ago.

So much has changed: jobs, where we live, plans for kids, the car she drives, starting our business almost 3 years ago, and now Beautiful working from home since February. We’ve been blessed with great trips, momentous family occasions, a roller coaster of health that always works out, and great friends and family that walk with us on this journey called life.

One thing is certain: I couldn’t have picked a more perfect partner to go on this journey with.

To make this year special, since we always seem to be running tight on the budget at our anniversary, I decided that we should go to Niagara Falls and spend more time with my grandparents as a layover and rest zone before and after. A few very hard weeks of working later, we had met the goals needed for the trip, got a falls view hotel on the Canadian side, and headed to Ohio.

No breakdowns this time!

We made it to my grandparents’ just after dinner on Monday and got to spend the next 2 days with them and my parents all in the old farmhouse. We left yesterday morning and drove through gloomy skies up into PA and NY and arrived at the hotel at 2:00. With check-in at 4:00, I went on in and asked if we could check in now – sure. We went through the formalities of the payment and ID and then he seemed new and asked the manager beside him what the difference between these rooms he was looking at was. “Those have Sleep Number beds.” At that point, my hotel training under the vast experience of Beautiful’s dad kicked in, and I quipped, “If it makes any difference which room we get, we’re here for our 5th anniversary.” The manager smiled and pointed at the screen and instructed him to pick ,”that one,” and wished us a wonderful stay and congratulated me.

I already saw that the paper had a complimentary upgrade to a high floor. We ended up with a room on the 15th floor. Upon entering the elevator, we saw that there are only 15 floors! Top floor, baby! We had purchased a city view but were suddenly in a room with a king bed, chair, LCD TV, jacuzzi tub, AND a view of the FALLS! I got choked up and I still get choked up looking out our window as I write this. It’s simply amazing – another bucket list item done.

We quickly rushed as fast as my lungs and legs could get us in the freezing misty rain to Maid of the Mist. The wind was howling to begin with, and then approaching the American Falls, the spray was intense as we slowly went by. As we approached the horseshoe of the Canadian Falls, the wind picked up a ton – hurricane force – and we were in awe of the volume of water, volume of the water’s noise. I took videos and photos until I couldn’t stand to keep our electronics out in the elements any longer. It was 1.15 miles, all uphill, back to the hotel where we had to turn the water all the way hot to thaw out our bones because our jeans got soaked on the boat.

This morning greeted us with the sun coming up over the falls in a golden yellow that looked like a fire in the clouds.

We’re off for more picture-taking and scenery now that my Vest and treatments are done.

Happy anniversary, Beautiful.

Our View

Canadian Falls

Adjusting to Life As an “Old CFer”

Nearly three years ago, I turned 30 and was rewarded with an awesome stainless steel grill to mark the milestone. Thanks, Beautiful! Since then, my appetite has decreased, my weight has (finally) increased, and I've been met with some really bad days … [Read more]

For my 300th Post: a Celebration

We've got one more full day left here with Grandpa and Grandma before we head back home. It's been a pretty emotional trip again. Last time I was so much a caregiver, I was "a bit off" in shock of that. This time I've been able to be more the … [Read more]

Anniversary 2011 Trip Photos

We're most of the way through our two-week vacation in Ohio/Niagara Falls now and have had a great time relaxing, visiting, and celebrating our anniversary. We've also been going crazy with our new camera. I've had my ups and downs of stamina walking … [Read more]

Fatboy and Beautiful – Five Wonderful Years

Five years ago today, I asked Beautiful if she would love, honor, and cherish me  for better or worse, in sickness and health - she said "I do," and so did I when she asked me. We kissed and ran down the isle to begin our new lives together. I … [Read more]

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